To hear a Lefty tell it Archie Bunker is the arch-typical Conservative. If that's so, what would Archie think of this "Obama" thing?

Can you see in your mind's eye Archie and his son-in-law Michael "Meathead" Stivic arguing about this Messiah? What a great battle that would be. Meathead pushing his atheist agenda which just happens to nicely dovetail with the Messiah's; Archie screaming "Shut up, you!" at him, daughter Gloria screaming "Daddy!" and Edith running from the kitchen to the ratty old chair beside Archie's, all the while fretting "Ohhhh Archie!" Too funny.

Would the Messiah's message play well in 1971 Queens? Not likely.

Of all the things one could speculate as to what Archie would think of the Messiah, Pinko would clearly be the favorite. While the term was around long before Archie mainstreamed it, hardly a more accurate descriptor could exist, and if Archie called the Messiah a Pinko he'd be dead on the money.

Pinko was first coined "by Time magazine in 1926 as a variant on the noun and adjective pink, which had been used along with parlor pink since the beginning of the 20th century to refer to those of leftish sympathies, usually with an implication of "effeteness". In the 1920s, for example, a Wall Street Journal editorial described supporters of the progressive politician Robert La Follette as "visionaries, ne'er do wells, parlor pinks, reds, hyphenates men who have never seen a shovel."" (Wikipedia, Pinko) Pinko is also defined as a less red version; a sort of "Commie Lite."

I think Pinko is dead on the money. And I love the "effeteness" part of the definition. In examining the definition of "effete" we discover that to be effete is to be "lacking in wholesome vigor, degenerate; decadent; exhausted of vigor or energy; worn out, as in an 'effete political force.'

But is this a fair analogy? Is the Messiah any or all of these things?

Well, let's see here . . . . pinko's are effete, and effete is to be not wholesome and degenerate. They are decadent, so that's fair. Their political ideology is indeed "worn out" so they are an "effete political force," and I would argue the dictionary definition of the left is "unable to produce [therefore] sterile." Sounds dead on to me!

And how would I characterize the adherents to this ideology? If we remember the 1960's we see this political movement is indeed filled with "ne'er do wells," so I give it a "10" for accuracy and it's got a good beat so it's easy to dance to (that's an American Bandstand reference for you youngsters).

Are they "visionaries?" Insane visionaries, yes! They are so damned sure they are right. They believe only they have the vision, thus visionary wisdoms us regular Joes lack. They are convinced that it is us, we non-Pinko Americans, who stand in the way of this Marx-like vision that these brilliant thinkers advocate. As I have before heard offered, we must be dragged kicking and screaming into the future. How arrogant!

So if I grasp this brilliant ideology, these pinkos are going to right my nation and save us from the evils of our tired old conservative ways whereby we climb the ladder of success by sacrificing any and all in our way. Pollution? My fault! Disease? My fault! Poverty? My fault! Hunger? My fault! Unemployment, inflation, deficits, war, bin-Laden, blah, blah, blah? Yep, my fault!

Golly gee gosh, I wish I were as erudite and "visionary" as these pinkos! That's it for me friends! I have seen the light. I am abandoning Conservatism to join the effete who see what you troglodytes cannot.

I feel enlightened already! No longer need I consider facts & history. Context is just a word for "evil Conservative justification." Free speech is only to be forwarded if said speech agrees with them. Yeah, let's bring back the Fairness Doctrine - after all, we need to shut up these sister fornicating Conservatives somehow! And if turning our backs on the First Amendment is the tool to achieve our end, then so be it! After all, we are the smart ones; we are the visionaries. Like our Messiah, dare not question us about our methods. We are smarter and we know what's best for you idiots.

Man I do love this new position I have co-opted. As the "Brilliant Ones" have advised my former compatriots, those dumbassed Conservatives, they should quit kicking and screaming as we drag them into the future. You Conservative haters, you morons, you unfit to live in a egalitarian society need to heed the Pinko advice and just come along quietly.

Whew! I switched allegiances just in time, too. What luck! Now I can join the effete; the visionaries; the ne'er do wells; the parlor pinks. Now I am finally home. We, the erudite, will lead the way. Just shut up, quit kicking and screaming, and come along quietly. We know what's best for you. And pay absolutely no attention to the past failures of our effete desires, ways and ideology. Remember, we are smarter than you, and the only reason the other pinko ideologies of the world failed was because they didn't do it "smart enough; nuanced enough." Plus, we are well schooled in "staying on message," so we're gonna win this time around.

Wow! Who'd of ever thought that to be a pinko could be so liberating? Nice!

Now THAT'S a winning ticket! Why keep beating around the George W. Bush? Stand up, be a man, and instead of dribs and drabs, go for it! Just think of how much gravitas Putin will bring to the ticket! I mean here's a guy who knows foreign relations and he has torture down to a science, so I think Obama/Putin '08 IS the Dream Ticket.

Let's face it friends, the only thing the Messiah is lacking is gravitas - well that and a genuine platform, but let's not quibble with facts. Democrats don't bother with facts, so why should I, right?

Putin is the man. He and Obama are a match made in Heaven, Ooops, I forgot. Putin is a Godless Commie and Obama is a radical Leftist, so no religion in the public square - my apologies. Putin's tough; Obama's not. He's short; Obama's not. He's white; Obama's not - well sort of not. He's decisive; Obama's not. He's actually done something; Obama hasn't.

And let's also consider that a running mate is made for numerous reasons, and one of the more important factors in picking a VP is for political reasons - can a running mate deliver votes to help the ticket? And this is where Vladimir Putin really shines! Not only can he deliver Russia, both the European part as well as the vast Asian Steppe, but apparently Putin has been working overtime to get the VP nod. He's already sent troops into Georgia to make sure Atlanta, Savannah and Macon are all on board. Now that's a teammate, huh?

So Lefties, come out in force for your winning team, the Obama/Putin '08 Vote for Change ticket! Maybe Putin's joining the ticket will give the Messiah the balls to actually admit that Marx, Lenin, Trotsky, Stalin and especially Vladimir Putin are his idols, and this present day Messiah is modeling his Messiahdom after his Marxist hero predecessors, who at least had the Goddamn guts to admit they were Marxists.

Perhaps Putin's joining the ticket will serve two most useful and needed purposes - it will allow our inexperienced Messiah the needed gravitas to carry the day and actually fool voters into believing he's not just an empty suit, but as well it might make Obama grow a pair and stand up and actually take a position he doesn't try to nuance and prevaricate so he can "stay on message." I'm gonna be laughin' all the way to the voting booth.

When Senator Barack Obama was in Israel last week he followed tradition and left a note to God in the crevices of the Wailing, or Western Wall. That his note was taken from its repository and made public is an interesting turn of events. And even more interesting in that the note and its public exposure was indeed planned by the Obama Campaign. That's right - planned!

It was all revealed when a spokesman for Maariv, Israel's second most popular newspaper, went public by saying "publication of the note was pre-approved for international publication by the Obama campaign, leading to the conclusion that the 'private' prayer was intentionally leaked for public consumption." As reported on Israeli Insider.com "A Ma'ariv spokesman was quoted in the Jerusalem Post as saying that 'Barack Obama's note was approved for publication in the international media even before he put [it] in . . . '" So there you have it.

But unknown to anyone but me, your faithful reporter, I have the REAL text of the Messiah's speech. Turns out the note that was "leaked" to the international media was a fake. The real prayer was also printed in Obama's handwriting, but it was stuffed too deep to be easily retrieved. Instead the planted note, the one that was leaked to the media, was stuffed in afterward by a slight of hand. Only I have the text of the actual note that was stuck in the wall, and I will reveal it to you now.

It too is written on the stationary of the King David Hotel. Following is the verbatim text of the original note to God:

Dear Dad,

It's Barack here - ya know, the Messiah! Anyway, I'm on this dumb trip to the war zones and now I've had to go see where my brother, your other son, Jesus, was crucified. Man, this place is hot in the summer. And I'm starting to look bad in the public eye, what with my constantly saying we lost in Iraq when we really won. It's going real good for Bush there now, and I'm having a hard sell on this "I'll withdraw from Iraq on day one" stuff. Anyhow, since this is the traditional place to leave one's prayer, I thought I'd ask some questions while I got your attention.

Why am I here? Haven't you told these mortals I am the Messiah? I ask because these fools are making me jump through hoops like I was any ol' Presidential candidate. All this "who struck John" is gettin' old Dad. I am tired of having to justify myself to these fools. I thought you had paved the way for me? If so, you're slippin' Dad. Do you know I am getting flak because that idiot McCain keeps trying to make me have these 10 townhall meetings. Now I'm good, damn near perfect, but you know my problems when I have to go off prompter, so I thought you'd hooked me up on this? As the Messiah I will look pretty bad if I have to go off prompter and answer these dumb questions from the idiot voters. And that's another thing - don't "your children" know who I am? If so they sure have a strange way of showing it!

And what about this FOX News bunch? I thought that had been taken care of as well? They're asking some tough questions and I'm doing my best to ignore them, but I can't keep this up forever. Eventually I'm going to have to go on O'Reilly and if so I don't think I'm gonna come off lookin' very good. Now I have no complaints about Chris Matthews and the MSNBC bunch - they've been a big help, but they can't carry all the weight. And the New York Times and the AP are trying to run cover for me, but they're fading fast, so how's about a hook up Dad? Arent' you ready to zap O'Reilly and send him to visit Lucifer for all eternity? I'm ready for ya to zap him and Hannity too!

Now look Dad, time to get serious about this leader of the free world stuff. If I am going to win this job I'm gonna need one of two things - either you zap the Conservatives and I get the job by default, or you are gonna have to step it up a bit here. These Conservatives are really asking some tough questions and they're getting to be a real pain in the Messianic hindparts. And speaking of rear ends, could you tell the broadcast network anchors to get their heads outta mine?

And what about the Europe leg of the trip? That hussy in Germany won't let me speak at the Brandenburg Gate - what's up with that? And she's a Conservative ya know Dad. And so is that Frenchie Frenchman Sarkozy, and that Gordon Brown dude in England is Conservative too! It's almost like this whole deal is slippin' away from me Pop. Why can't I just be President of Europe? They love me there!

Oh, I do want to pass along some good news (don't wanna seem like I'm just a whining little brat! I know, that's your pet name for me, but that's our secret). Kudos on scheduling those two popular bands to draw and warm up the crowd for me in Berlin. Hopefully it'll look like they dig the Messiah! But keep the rock band thing on the down low or FOX will broadcast it to the whole world. I can hear 'em now - "Turns out Obama's 'big crowd' in Berlin came to see the bands and stayed to listen to Obama for the free brats and beer." Dad, that'll really make me look like a pandering idiot, and I've have enough of that already!

Anyway, I gotta go put that other note in the wall now. When I get back to the US can you make FOX go away? And get them right wing bloggers too. They're getting a little too close for comfort. It's gotten so bad I can't have sleepovers with Bill Ayers and Rev. Wright anymore. And Tony Rezko has been calling wanting to 'hang out' and I miss Tony. We're tight, ya know?

Oh, and one more thing before I go - the next time I make a major announcement, like when I announced I was running for the US Senate, could you counsel me a tad bit better? When I told ya I was going to Billy Ayers to announce my candidacy, you said fine! Do you know how hard it is to fool these people that Billy and I aren't friends? And would you relieve a little pressure on me and give Michelle lockjaw for the next 8 years? Her mouth, both in media, and in my ear, is driving me crazy Dad. I swear, if that gorilla lookin' thing don't shut up she's gonna screw me right out of the Presidency. And then she'll harp in my ear for the next eight years . . . "Barack, if you hadn't (fill in the blank) I'd be First Lady." I don't think I can take that for 8 years Dad, so do the lockjaw thing for me on big mouth.

Later Dad, and Fist Bumps to ya -

Your Boy Barack "The Messiah" Obama

AUTHORS NOTE: While the "second prayer" is parody, the first two paragraphs about the Obama prayer being released for publication with the prior knowledge of said event is 100% true, and NOT parody. Check my included link for the original report. This is 100% fact.

http://web.israelinsider.com/Articles/Politics/13021.htm

How fitting is it that Denver, the city at the eastern foot of the majestic Rocky Mountains, is the host city for the Democrat National Convention this year? Come August Colorado's capital will be blessed with a visit from the Messiah Himself. The Messiah will sweep into Denver, His disciples dutifully in tow as they follow in the wake of His flowing robes. Lucky they will be to cast their eyes upon Him, their Savior!

As the plans for the Messiah's visit are jelling some adjustments have been made to accommodate all of His followers. No longer will the Pepsi arena, the venue hosting the convention, be sufficient to hold the throngs of admirers. There has been talk of moving the Messiah's acceptance speech to Invesco Field, the 70.000 seat stadium where the Denver Broncos play in order to seat the masses so they may cast their gaze upon Him as they listen, rapt and enthralled as His words wash over them.

But wait . . . what if the Messiah draws more disciples than even we can imagine? More than even Invesco Field can sit? In order to accommodate the glut of fools, er . . . I mean disciples, I suggest the acceptance speech be moved to a more suitable venue, and while we're at it, let's call it what it really is.

It's time for we, the unwashed to accept that indeed our Savior has arrived. Let's just quit beating around the bush. I say the Messiah move his speech from Invesco Field to the nearest high peak of the Rockies overlooking the plains of Denver. Then and only then will the venue be correct, and let us name this what it really is. From on high, above the western plain of the Denver suburbs the Messiah can deliver His Sermon on the Mount.

Finally a venue suitable for the Savior! And finally a name suitable for the message He will deliver. I have an advance copy of the Messiah's words, and for those unable to attend I will give you a sneak peek into the Sermon on the Mount the Messiah will bless us with.

After an approximately 30 to 45 minute ovation for the Messiah, He will speak to we mere mortals. He will begin with His beatitudes. He will address the downtrodden with his admonition "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." After the fainting subsides the Messiah will continue, and in speaking of Himself He will offer "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God, or sons of Me, whichever you prefer." Again, speaking of Himself He will offer "Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven, where I live." And the Messiah will tell you "You are the salt of the Earth. . . You are the Light of the World."

He will advise the unwashed to follow Him and Him alone, for he is the Messiah, here to save us all from ourselves. He will caution you not to make false vows, but to fulfill your vows to Him. He will tell you to go the extra mile, to love your neighbor and "therefore you are to be perfect, as your Heavenly Father is perfect," as well as I, your Messiah am perfect.

He will warn against your "practicing righteousness before men to be noticed by them. . .do not sound a trumpet before you as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets." Only the Messiah is so entitled to trumpet His own horn, for you are the unwashed and only He is the righteous.

The Messiah will assist you in fulfilling his next admonition "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on Earth," by making sure to take from you so you do not become greedy and self righteous. The Messiah will caution that you cannot serve the Messiah and wealth, "as you will love one master and hate the other."

The Messiah will comfort you by telling you ". . . do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?" He will tell you "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself."

Cautioning the unwashed he will admonish "Do not judge so that you will not be judged." He will tell you not to notice the shortcomings of others, as you have your own, that only He is free of these Earthly and mortal sins.

In keeping with the storied traditions of the Democrat faithful the Messiah will advise "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened."

Building to a crescendo the Messiah will warn "Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits."

And lastly, as the throngs sway in his aura the Messiah will close with the assurance "Therefore everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts on them , may be compared to a wise man who built his house on the rock . . . Everyone who hears these words of Mine and does not act on them, will be like the foolish man who built his house on the sand . . . ."

When the applause dies, what will we have?

What I see and hear is little different from the Democrat talking points for the last 60 years or so . . . first the assurance to the masses that He is the true choice, that you, the unwashed, if only you will stand with Him He will see to your needs . . . remain faithful and at His side you may reside. He wants to make sure you follow through with your pledges of donations and working for Him, the Messiah, and in so doing make sure you go the extra mile for Him. He doesn't want you to lament your non-perfection, for He is perfect for you, in your name.

The Messiah tells you that money is a corrupter and you cannot serve the almighty dollar and Him at the same time. To assist in throwing off the yoke of Western Culture he will provide for your hunger and your thirst, and do not judge His methods and motives, for if so, you will be judged, harshly one would assume. And He tells you, His children, to look to Him and ask, and He will provide. And in closing he warns against questioning Him and any other prophet, for He is the Messiah, and if one just follows his teachings, admonishments and desires you will rest at His side, for if you follow Him you will have "built [your] house on the rock."

So, Denver at the foot of the Mount; the Messiah at the foot of the Mount, the masses straining to glimpse their prophet who will deliver them from the evil Republicans, and all the Messiah need do is climb (or glide as the prophets seem to do as they move breathlessly over the Earth) to the top of the Mount and deliver His Sermon.

Yeah, I guess this IS the Second Coming. How nice for we unwashed!

When I started contributing to the plethora of blatherings on the WWW I had no idea what a Liberal place this ephemeral destination could be.  I foolishly thought the WWW would be a neutral place where all the combined information of Human existence could be found. Man was I wrong!

Sure, there's info out here. But you'd better be damned careful WHERE you get your facts.

I also write on another WWW media outfit called Associated Content (AC).  I write under the name BlowHard there because that is the moniker hung upon me by some of the Liberal dolts that populate that place.  Not that I mind though - call me whatever suits ya.  Some of my articles from there are reprised here on Townhall.  If any of you fine folks wanna go there and support me, please, by all means have at it - I could use all the support I can get, and here's why:

I have come to the conclusion in my four years of writing on the Net that this is where the disaffected Liberal can be found.  They lurk in the shadows of sanity and reality.  They have substituted fact, verifiable and undeniable for the fiction they WISH were fact.

Is it just me or do these Leftists seem as if they just stepped out of Alice in Wonderland?  It's all rainbows and Unicorns.  Conservatives are Nazis - ALL OF US!  At least to hear them tell it.

They have no grounding in reality.  They have over active imaginations.  They are all conspiracy theorists.  Here's an example:  I posited that Nancy Pelosi clamied, prior to the 2006 mid-term elections thet she would lead the "most moral Congress ever."  Yet 18 months into this wonderful new morality, we find that Congress has launched over 300 investigations into all things Bush Administration.  In the over 300 investigations NOT ONE SINGLE FACT has been unearthed to support any allegation, let alone justifying the need for more than 300 investigations, yet by their claim of the 300 investigations they assert that that is them being moral,  Say what?

To hear Pelosi, her Dem brethern, and their insane supporters in the blogsosphere, the 300 investigations are indeed proof Congress is doing their jobs. Again, say what?  All Pelosi's actions prove to me is that Dem politicos are remaining loyal to leaders Reid and Pelosi's desires to "get Bush."

And the number one casualty of this war is truth.  These Leftists use all manner of blog crappola as "proof" for their fantasy-like assertions. They maintain every evil they allege is 100% fact, and but for the evil Bush & Cheneny controlling the media (SAY WHAT???????????), the American public would know the truth.

Just this morning I read on AC how some Lib jerk maintains Limbaugh is a liar, and he pointed to some liberal website as the arbiter of truth. I think it's called exdittohead.com or some such.  Anyway, since when are the disaffected the authorities on someone's veracity?  So, if I hate John Doe, am I the most unbiased of sources for the truth about Mr. Doe?  Of course not, unless that  is, you are hoping to be fed facts that suit your predisposed opinion.

And therein lies the crux of this whole issue.  The Left are disaffected and will grasp at any straw that plays to their template. When it comes to truth, if a partisan Lefty ever tells ya the truth when it comes to policy and politics, it's because the truth suits 'em.  If on the other hand the truth harms their argument, rest assured you will be countered by one of two retorts - either called a liar, or conversely they will point you to a Lib website that plays to the Liberal bias.  These people wouldn't know the truth if it smacked 'em in the head.

And speaking of that, here's an idea to deal with this problem. Go to your local home retail outlet, Lowes or Home Depot your choice, and purchase a 2x4. Ask them to cut it into two 4 ft. lengths - they'll be glad to do it for you, no charge. When you get the 2 boards home take a black Sharpie and write, in really big letters across both sides of the board TRUTH. Then go to the local Starbucks or some other Liberal hangout and wait by the door.  When one of the metrosexual Libs exits the building smack 'em with the 2x4 right on the back of their head.

Now don't worry about injuring the poor metrosexual - their heads are hard as a rock so the most damage you'll do is break the board over that hatrack that sits on their slumped shoulders.  But at least you'll get their attention.  Then and only then will the Liberal have been exposed to TRUTH.  They may not learn the facts, but at least maybe they'll learn that their are indeed other viewpoints that are valid.  In my experience, lacking a "come to Jesus moment," these idiots will continue to use the Internet to spread their hate and disaffection.

Liberals are living proof of the axiom, "A little knowedge is a dangerous thing," and indeed when it domes to Liberals, a "Little Knowledge" is what they have. Oh, and that other half of the 2x4? Give it to a Conservative friend. They're bound to know a metrosexual or two who are in dire need of exposure to the truth. Have at it my friends. Let's smack 'em all into reality 'cause they sure are in dire need of it.

AUTHORS NOTE:  My mention of AC was not an attempt to garner readership or to further any goal other than to demonstrate my thesis, that the Net is a Liberal Heaven, and a Conservative Hell, at least when it comes to truth and reality.

Newsflash - - - -

Dateline: Berlin, April 20, 1949

Today, in a stroke of the utmost luck, our Berlin correspondent Biff Barfsalot sat down for a rare one-on-one interview with Nazi Fuhrer Adolf Hitler. Biff Barfsalot's interview with the Fuhrer is the first granted to a western journalist since early in the war. Barfsalot was granted an interview with the German Fuhrer on the occasion of Hitler's 60th birthday.

Following is a transcript of the interview with closing statements and summary from our on the spot reporter, Biff Barfsalot:

BB: Chancellor Hitler, how can you explain the resurgence of Nazism and the military success of The Fatherland in the wake of nearly insurmountable Allied military strength and momentum in 1944?

AH: I channeled Frederick the Great and listened carefully to what he told me. Frederick & I are cut from the same cloth - we are both saviors of the Reich - he in his time, I in mine.

BB: How did you manage to keep the Reich together under the monumental onslaught from your enemies?

AH: The Abwehr, the Reich's intelligence service, listened closely to the political in fighting coming from the Untied States. The US is so unwise and flawed as to place in the public forum their innermost political debates. As an observer of history it was easy to see what was coming. When I was informed of the untenable positions of the American politicians, I knew it was only a matter of time until the weakness of capitalism showed itself. I have always believed the youth of National Socialism were superior to the youth of decadent western nations. Since I was elected Chancellor in 1933 I was out to prove to the world that the ideology of National Socialism would in time reign supreme, and as we look back over recent history we can clearly observe the results.

BB: You must have had moments of doubt. During the darkest days of your Reich in early 1944, under the incessant Allied bombing and renewed attacks of the Soviets, surely you must have had some point where human frailty and doubt pervaded your confidence?

AH: Yes, the traitorous attempt to kill me in July, 1944, was indeed the Reich's darkest moments. But destiny had another plan in store for me, and as I go, so goes the German people and the Fatherland! I walked away nearly unscathed, and at that moment I knew I was bound for victory.

BB: But how?

AH: Well, the first mistake by the allies, and the first inclination that proved to me my fate was destined for higher achievement, was when I watched westerners experience a rise in Leftism in the US and the England. Now, as England was under siege, they quelled the opposition, but not so in the US.

BB: How so?

AH: With the rise of this Leftist ideology in America I saw two distinct opportunities - the first was to use your political transparency against you. As you know one of the first things we did in the Reich was to outlaw the Communist Party, and we rounded up all Communists and Leftists. When we eliminated that threat to our nation we were freed from a major encumbrance to Germany's need for Lebensraum (living space to the east of Germany proper to be used to settle ethnic Germans in the conquered territories).

BB: And the second opportunity you saw?

AH: The second is opportunity is a result of the first one I mentioned. American political transparency and failure to eliminate the Leftist threat in the US led to the very policy that freed the Fatherland from beneath the weight of the Allied attacks. When Leftist politicians in your nation began to grumble about "casualties," and the length of time it was taking for the Allies to breakout of Normandy, I took advantage of your system's inherent weaknesses. And then I danced a jig when those very same Leftists started calling for a "timeline for withdrawal" and I knew in the end Germany would become resurgent and prevail in this battle of ideologies.

BB: And this was all it took for you to become convinced Germany would win?

AH: Ja! Correct. At the mention of a "timeline for withdrawal" I was able to completely revamp our military's deployments. When talk of withdrawal came from Washington I became convinced a bold stroke would destroy the Western alliance and allow Germany to concentrate on the real threat to the world - that of Russian Bolshevism! And so it was. My Wacht am Rhine operation, known in the West as the Battle of the Bulge, was the opening of the door.

BB: Did you have an idea your operation would defeat the Allies?

AH: Of course! That was the very purpose of Wacht am Rhine. To divide the Allied armies and drive for Antwerp, and so we did. I knew a bold stroke, amidst all the American political in fighting and the demand for a withdrawal timeline, would put the nail in the coffin of the Allied coalition. My armies, the Wehrmacht and the armed SS, the Waffen SS, were emboldened by what we saw happening in America. Your nation had lost its resolve. You must remember, I have always believed National Socialism was the superior ideology, and history has proved me correct.

BB: So, you maintain that at the moment you heard of the purposed timeline for withdrawal you altered your intentions?

AH: Absolutely! But for the Leftist suggestions of withdrawal from Europe, I am afraid the Allies combined strength would have eventually overwhelmed the Fatherland.

BB: So, would you then say that the American political system was its downfall?

AH: Well, I think an even cursory look at history proves me out. As long as Left and Right fought each other in the US, they had less energies to fight National Socialism! As I sat in my Berlin bunker I was amazed to hear of this "timeline" your Leftist politicians dreamed up. To tell an enemy, or any foe for that matter, what you intended to do to defeat said enemy was your most foolish move. To announce to the world that the casualties were too high, the price too steep, the returns on human investment so unsure for their investment, well. . . as I said, I danced the jig. Your politicians told the world they were not in this for the long haul. Of course, once such a concept swept 'round the globe your Allies lost confidence in you, and conversely, your enemies were strengthened.

BB: Don't you think you are stating that too strongly, Mr. Hitler?

AH: Nein! My armies and I knew that we were playing a game of timing and the US announced their timeline for withdrawal for the world to see. And history bears me out, no?

BB: Well, based on all that's happened since the end of 1944, it would seem you were correct.

AH: Ja, ja! We knew we only had to wait and make American presence in Europe too painful and too drawn out. And let's not forget that your Leftist press leaking the details of your atomic bomb program only helped us further. When your American Leftists so objected to an atomic weapon, your nation, quite inadvertently I must add, restarted my atomic bomb program. The American lack of resolve allowed the Fatherland to husband our resources on the Eastern Front and hold off the Russian Bolsheviks until 1946 when we dropped our atomic bombs on Moscow, Leningrad and Stalingrad. Of course, the Bolsheviks seeing our power immediately surrendered, and I, as Chancellor of Germany and the Greater Reich, and the Fuhrer of the Germanic peoples delivered on all my promises.

BB: So, Mr. Hitler, you are maintaining that more than anything else, American weakness, lack of resolve and our soft sensibilities were the tools for German victory?

AH: Ja! That and the superior ideology of National Socialism over Capitalism and Bolshevism! I have singlehandedly eradicated European Jewry, Bolshevism and so weakened the Western powers that my Third Reich will indeed be a "Thousand Year Reich!"

End of interview.

In this reporter's opinion Mr. Hitler was an honest, albeit, full of himself, interviewee. Hitler clearly and honestly described how he was at the end of his rope until the leaking of the American atomic weapons program and the subsequent ending of the program, coupled with Leftist politicos seizing the offensive in the Congress and forcing a timeline for withdrawal. The forcing of said timeline only strengthened our enemies. Hitler saw a chance and staged his brilliant counter stroke, Wacht am Rhine, which then split the Allied armies and planted the seeds to end the Allied cooperation. Hitler was then able to marshal his forces onto his Eastern threat - the Bolsheviks. He held them off until he dropped the atomic bombs and the Russians capitulated.

The world is now a vastly different place. How long will the United States remain free, as long as Hitler's Third Reich stretches from the Bay of Biscay to the Volga; from the North Sea to the northern shore of the African Continent? With the US now standing alone in the world, do we have long to remain free?

Questions must be asked of our nation. How far are we willing to go to protect American Jews from Hitler's desires? If Hitler had the ability to drop atomic weapons on the US, would he do so, if for no other reason than to rid the globe of Jews? As the only Jews left on Earth are Americans, how much resolve will we demonstrate? What price are we willing to pay to protect such a small portion of our citizens? Perhaps deportation to Europe for Hitler's whim? Or will we develop the resolve to do whatever it takes to defeat despotism? Based on the recent history, that question goes unanswered.

Maybe with the closing of the darkest period of the world, the 1940's, perhaps the 1950's will show some American backbone, and perhaps a new dawn will open bright. If not, in listening to the war of philosophy presently being waged in the United States, if history is our guide, we may soon all be National Socialists.

Author's Note: This was a totally fictitious "what if" scenario. I was applying today's American political sensibilities to recent historical events to demonstrate how slightly different actions, and their timing, may have a profound effect on the future. And while this was pure fiction, that does not mean that it could not have happened if events had played out as I fictionalized them. Lastly, my mention of Nazi's and National Socialism IS NOT in any way an endorsement of Hitler, his ideology or his prosecution of the war. Any mention of the elimination of Jews was entirely for demonstrative purposes, and in no way reflects the feeling of this author.

So if I get this, Senator Barack Obama, the presumptive nominee of the Democrat Party, is on his own tour of duty? At least that's how Lester Holt, an MSNBC talking head, describes the Messiah's visits around the world. It just gets thicker and thicker, don't it?

MSNBC, that paragon of cable news networks, a liberal haven if one ever exists, even went so far as to broadcast a picture of Obama and the banner "Tour of Duty" running across the screen. And anchor Holt introduced the segment with "... a Tour of Duty as Obama visits the war zone, the fight over where to send combat troops next." How nice! Amazing. I guess that Obama isn't qualified to "send" out for Chinese food, much less where to deploy US troops isn't germane to the fawning presentations of the enablers at MSNBC, CNN, the three broadcast networks and any other incompetent and totally in the tank for Obama media outlet on this blue rock!

I just wonder exactly how many fawning media dolts can get their heads up Obama's butt at one time? Do they rush for the sphincter to be the first 4 or 5 get to shove their heads up his backside? Is it a free-for-all? Or do they draw lots? Ya know, today the three broadcast anchors get to grease up their heads with KY Jelly and go for the big insert? Just who decides whose head gets the pleasure of inspecting the Messianic colon? Man, I want that job!

Is a trip abroad, an election foray thinly disguised as a Congressional fact finding mission (what a friggin' crock!), sufficient to grant the Messiah the gravitas to now have garnered "foreign policy experience?" I wonder, because that is how some of the apologists that call themselves news networks are characterizing Obama's all expense paid vacation.

So, I guess my wife's upcoming business trip to Rome will be sufficient "foreign policy experience" for her to be the next Messiah? I hope so 'cause that'll mean I am doing to the Messiah (my wife) what the Messiah (Obama) is about to do to this whole damned nation if we are so stupid as to vote for this pandering fool.

And maybe I'm just not paying close enough attention, but have the other two US Senators accompanying the Messiah on his "fact finding mission" even spoken to the press a single time? I saw The Messiah defer a question to Chuck Hagel, a Republican Senator, but Hagel begged off and deferred back to the Messiah. Well, considering this is nothing but a campaign trip, I guess that's about appropriate.

And how about Katie Couric? She took the Messiah to task about his not supporting the uber successful surge in Iraq. And he didn't like the tough questioning of Couric when the Messiah repeatedly obfuscated and skirted the direct answer and instead did his trick he learned from the DNC on how to nuance an answer. And he failed terribly. I'll say it again. The Messiah sure can give a great speech when reading from the prompter, but lock him in a room and make him answer tough questions, sans his 300 foreign policy advisers, and he's a bumbling idiot!

And how about that? 300 foreign policy advisers? So his 300 foreign policy advisers are because he's so experienced, or because he's not so experienced? I must not get it. Hell, I could learn quantum physics if I had 300 advisers coaching me through it. And isn't the need for 300 foreign policy advisers enough proof to the world that this clown is so untested, so unqualified, that he NEEDS 300 advisers to cover it for him?

And to prove my point, Obama has continually slandered our troops by refusing to give them the credit for the success for the surge. It's because he cannot admit that the surge was a success because he was against it from proposal to implementation, to its successful completion. He has however credited al-Sadr stepping back and myriad other ephemeral possibilities as to why the surge worked, but he cannot bring himself to admit he was and still is wrong about the surge. He's about as arrogant as a soul can be.

And talk about arrogance.... Have any of you fine readers heard this bumbling idiot's mouthpieces as they TWICE referred to the Messiah as the President of the United States? They were justifying the Messiah's speechifying and such, and they were saying, (I paraphrase) "Hey, when the President gives a speech abroad, it's not a campaign event...," to which the reporters to whom the talking heads were explaining had to correct them TWICE that the Messiah IS NOT the President.

In closing, if I go to Rome with my wife in October, when I return I will be an expert in foreign policy. I mean, if the Messiah can do it, why not me? And to hear his apologists, this non-campaign (tongue firmly in cheek) fact finding mission is just the ticket for one to go from idiot to expert. Well, that and having THREE HUNDRED foreign policy advisers! You've gotta be kidding, right?

So what does it mean to be "Behind the Curve?" It can be applied to almost any situation. It is a baseball term, whereby if you're thrown a curve and your not out in front of the curve, you're not going to contact the ball, but now the term has found its way into the lexicon. So, what does it mean to be "Behind the Curve?" Is it necessarily a bad thing, or more just the way it is - reality I mean?

The first area in which we are "Behind the Curve," is in energy development and acquisition. But this is nothing new at all. This will disappoint many of you, but reality dictates that far more often than not the need proceeds the fulfillment. Technology responds to need with an answer. That's not to say the solution arrives at the exact moment one would desire, but it is still the reality.

Again, many will not like this but the facts remain: until the last year or so oil was plentiful (it still is) and CHEAP! When oil was $25.00 a barrel where is the impetus to develop new and expensive technologies? How can a justification be made to a company's board of directors that billions should be sunk into experimental technologies when oil is $25.00 a barrel? And how can an oil company be held responsible for this?

Well, since we have 150 million cars in the US and they all run on refined oil, where is the obligation for oil companies to develop a competing product? That's stupid! Isn't it the position of Big Oil to drill, transport, refine and sell oil derivatives? Of course it is, and that's what they do.

I own a deli. I am obligated to develop a competing technology? Am I obligated to open another deli that strictly caters to any specific nutritional requirement? So, if I owned a bakery is it incumbent upon me, the bakery owner to then open a "healthy food" establishment, since a bakery is clearly not producing and selling "healthy?" Of course not - that's an asinine position.

So, do you in your personal life open a business that competes with what you are already employed doing? If one owns a lawn mowing business, is it incumbent upon the business owner to develop alternatives to grass? That's as ignorant as about anything anyone could expect, now ain't it? Now that the reality has presented itself that alternatives are needed, it is the time for the technology genius to respond, and respond they will. But it will take time - that's reality folks!

So, now we have a need for more oil & natural gas, and since that's what Big Oil does, shouldn't we stfu and let 'em do what they do best? I know this is a simple concept, but it seems to have become lost in these hyper-partisan days of an upcoming presidential election.

And this "68 million acres of leases Big Oil already owns" is sophistry in the extreme. For your edification, Big Oil has to PAY for those leases regardless if oil is there or not. They have "X" number of years to develop & pump the oil or they lose the lease. If the land has oil the oil companies have to pay to renew the lease term, just like leasing an apartment. So, if there is no oil there is this Big Oil's fault? If I lease you 10 acres of land and I demand you grow corn, yet the land is a swamp, are YOU the bad guy? Will you renew the lease with the stipulation you grow corn if that is a physical impossibility?

Now according to mainstream media talking points Big Oil is an evil, Capitalist, money grubbing enterprise. If that's so, explain to me why Big Oil is NOT pumping the oil for which they could earn $140.00 a barrel and for which they already own leases on the 68 million acres? If there were oil there Big Oil, the evil Capitalist Empire would drill the damned stuff! When I hear this talking point I know I am listening to a partisan or an idiot. Now, if you're a partisan, fine - I get it. If you're an idiot . . .

Have I successfully explained WHY it is demagoguery to blame Big Oil for the need for new energy? The truth is the environmental lobby is dead set against any fossil fuels and nuclear power, so if ya wanna know who is responsible for the current mess look to your nearest tree hugger.

Wanna fix this problem? Drill the Continental shelf. There are 88 BILLION barrels on the US Outer Continental Shelf (OCS). Wanna fix this? Do as Hitler did in WW2 and turn coal into synthetic fuel. Wanna fix this? Build nuclear power plants AND develop wind, solar, fuel cells and develop ANWR. Has anyone else noticed that oil has fallen $11.00 a barrel SINCE Bush lifted the Executive ban on OCS drilling? Coincidence? I'll betcha there's a damn boatload of you fine folks that will say, "yep, just a coincidence." Amazing!

Wanna see oil continue to fall in price? Write your Congressional representative and tell 'em "Drill it all and drill it now," and the price will plummet as soon as Congress gets off the dime and opens up all areas to drilling. Tell 'em to build atomic power plants and prices will fall further. I know there are many who disagree, but that's an emotional or purely partisan response. Common Sense (there's that damned phrase again) would dictate that when we tell the OPEC despots to kiss our collective asses, prices will fall dramatically.

So can you see how it works? A need presents itself and those in the business of responding to the need do so. When oil was $25.00 a barrel there was no need to develop an alternative to cheap and plentiful energy supplies. This is not rocket science friends. But its IS a political football and anyone from either side of the political fence that pretends anything else is just playing partisan politics. Considering the need, isn't this about as irresponsible as one could be? To see a real and desperate need and then to play politics with the solutions that are right in front of our faces? That's demagoguery in it's highest manifestation.

On the road to Hell . . .

Leave the state of Reality and head south 'til ya come to the state line. Crossing over the line, you will be in the state of Idealism. Soon after reaching Idealism you'll be beset by numerous confusing choices. Depending on your embrasure of life in Idealism will determine the degree of happiness one will enjoy while living there. If while a resident of Idealism one decides that Idealism is nice, but not really the place for them, one must leave as soon as possible. Almost any other state will suffice, but leaving Idealism behind is the first step of the renewed journey, and your eventual destination will be a return to Reality.

If, on the other hand Idealism is the place for you, then one must find a permanent abode. In what region within the state of Idealism will you live? Will you proceed down Discontent Drive until you reach Scientific Consensus? Now Scientific Consensus is a great place - if you can stand the weather, what with incessant hurricanes, melting glaciers and severe swings in climatic conditions, but an "always on your toes" type place if ever there was one.

If you'd prefer a less stimulating area, turn left onto Regret Turnpike and go the stoplight. Turn onto Halliburton Expressway and follow that 'til ya hang a right onto Bush Empire Blvd. and that'll lead ya straight into Moral Relativism. It's anything goes there, tradition be damned, so have fun. But lock up your wife and daughters, and your dog for that matter. Hell, since anything goes, ya never who will do what, but hey, everything in life is a trade off, am I right? At least there's no crime, what with morality being relative and all. It's all a matter of perspective, and if Joe Pedophile thinks NAMBLA rocks, oh well . . . btw, don't you have an 11 year old son?

If Moral Relativism is too foot loose and fancy free for ya, get onto Theocracy Way and head east 'til ya come to Hypocrisy. Now this is one fine place, but don't count on anything anyone tells ya - especially your local elected governmental representative! Lacking that, Hypocrisy is really nice. Why be bothered with that tired old concept of "my word is my bond," when ya get to live in such a hip place as Hypocrisy? A suggestion though - if ya want the best of both worlds, live on the dividing line between Moral Relativism and Hypocrisy. Now that's livin'!

Now, for some folks Moral Relativism or Hypocrisy are too intense and they opt for more suitable environs. Many of these people decide to move to Pipe Dream. To get there ya need to head out onto Big Oil Avenue and follow that to intersection of Malcontent & Disenchanted. Turn onto Disenchanted St. and you'll soon find yourself in Pipe Dream.

The beauty of Pipe Dream is it's the exact opposite of living in Reality, and for some citizens this is the best option. In Pipe Dream anything, nay, everything is possible - after all, it's a frickin' pipe dream, right? Why be bound by the insanity and limitations of Reality when Pipe Dream is so near? The only problem with living in Pipe Dream is that no one can stay there forever. And for those peeps the only option left is Historical Revisionism.

Historical Revisionism is the last stop in Idealism - if ya can't make it there, ya can't make it anywhere. To get there you'll need to turn onto War for Oil Crescent and as soon as you pass Surrender Monkey cul-de-sac take any road ya want to get there. You can turn onto Sanctimonious St. and get there, or for the scenic route take the Disgruntled & Frustrated Thruway.

Now talk about a damned nice place, Historical Revisionism is the deal! A resident of Idealism can stay here forever. No need to consider the facts of why one had to leave Reality. That's the beauty of Historical Revisionism - you can consider or ignore, your choice, as to why you needed to leave the state of Reality and why you now choose to reside in the state of Idealism. And a wonderful place it is! There's the Mall of America Haters for you shoppers, and for the kiddies be sure to visit the Selected Not Elected Amusement Park. And while you're there don't miss the hanging Chad ride and of course, the Electoral College Bar & Grill for some good humble pie. Now thems are some good eats!

You can completely discount the common knowledge. You can ignore the wisdom of the ages. No need to consult the learned ones - you can be whatever you want to be. That's the beauty of Idealism in its entirety. No matter where in the state of Idealism one chooses to reside, the results are all the same. Really, it is! The state of Idealism is the state of Scientific Consensus, Moral Relativism, Hypocrisy, Pipe Dream and Historical Revisionism all rolled into one fuzzy little fluff ball of unicorns, rocking horses and rainbows.

Just think of all the evils you can leave behind in Reality. In the state of Idealism there is no war, for oil or anything else - it's been outlawed. No need to drill for energy & resources - if they can't be taxed into magically appearing at least they'll be able to fast-track into fruition these new and wonderful alternatives. Healthcare worries? Not here - not in Idealism. No one is allowed to over eat or smoke, so those two evils have been dealt with. And everyone is welcome in the emergency rooms in the state of Idealism. Yeah, the lines are long, but hey, it's free for Christsakes - whatcha want, perfection? Ooops . . . sorry, I forgot, you do want perfection.

And that trip to Hell? No worries, you're on the right path. If you're headed for the state of Idealism you are already well on your way there. Turns out the road to Hell, as well as the road to Idealism, is paved with good intentions. Napoleon was right . . . "It is but a small step from the sublime to the ridiculous!"

I knew I'd find it somewhere, someday. And sure enough, I picked up a biography on Comrade Stalin and began to devour it. In it I have discovered the "how-to" manual Liberals are employing in their maniacal dash for political, social and economic supremacy in the United States. It is known as The Revolutionary's Catechism.

In the biography entitled Stalin, author Edvard Radzinsky introduced his readers to The Revolutionary's Catechism by Sergei Nechaev. Nechaev's catechism was the road map used by the Reds in their grab for the power of the Russian government.

Author Radzinsky was tenacious in gaining access to the Party Archives after the collapse of the Soviet empire. He likens his foray into those archives as taking the first footsteps into the secrets of "that incorrigibly conspiratorial party," as he describes the Bolsheviks and Communists in general.

Let's examine this statement for a moment. An "incorrigibly conspiratorial party," the author stated. Taking the statement at face value Radzinsky summed up not only the practical realization of Soviet Communism as practiced for 70 odd years, but he also indicted the methods employed by the Reds in their power grab, and used to assassinate the character of various Party members as they fell in and out of favor. And that conspiracy bit sounds a lot like the conspiracy theorists we find in the US today.

By way of demonstration as to the commitment of the Bolsheviks, Radzinsky points out the Revolutionary's Catechism's admonition that "comrades are to be valued only in accordance with their usefulness to the cause."

And these practices of the Reds were not only employed upon Party members to keep them in line; these same tactics were turned loose on the countryside as well. They used the term "expropriation" to describe their methods. They justified all manner of actions as acceptable within the revolutionary's toolkit: murder and political assassination, bank robbery, extortion, you name it; the Bolsheviks used it to gain power - and to keep it.

At the head of this movement of Marxism lay a small cadre of leaders. These leaders adhered to Russian Populist Peter Tkachev words when he wrote "Revolution can be successfully carried out by a narrow conspiratorial group of revolutionary leaders. They must seize power first then transform a country accustom to slavish submission."

Furthermore in their quest for power the revolutionaries took one of Sergei Nechaev's proverbial commands and put it to brilliant use. In fact, their implementation of TheRevolutionary's Catechism was complete when they accepted "Our task is terrible; universal destruction." Thus bent on power and knowing no bounds to achieve it, they resolved "To carry out the work of destroying the system . . ." In advising as to sewing discontent among the populace, the revolutionary ". . . must aggravate the miseries of the common people, so as to exhaust their patience and incite them to rebel."

And at the same time we find "Lenin meanwhile promised it all: land for the peasants and peace for Russia." Yeah, that sounds about right. That's exactly what happened to Russia in the later part of the second decade of the 20^th Century - a destroyed society and hollow promises.

To put a nice spin on their hopes of power the Bolsheviks preached the virtues of Marx: "Self-sacrifice in the service of the poor and the oppressed, the protest against an unjust society, the promise of a Kingdom of Righteousness and the enthronement of a new Messiah (the World Proletariat)."

So, how did the "Kingdom of Righteousness" and the "new Messiah" thing turn out?

To answer that question one need only cast their eyes in an eastward glance. If you strain your eyes to see past the hustle and bustle of a somewhat capitalist, reasonably prosperous Europe, you can just make out the smoldering ruins of the failure. Complete, total, abject and unequivocal.

A monumental failure at that. The Soviet Union was one of the two most powerful nations on the planet, then BOOM! See ya! Apparently Adolf Hitler was right when in the 1940's he opined the Soviet Union was a house of cards; one good kick and the whole facade would come tumbling down, and so it was, exposed for the charade it had always been.

Was the Soviet Union the failure it was because of the Bolshevik bastardization of Marx? To some degree, absolutely, but I believe there is another key factor to consider; that being the treatment the Bolsheviks meted out to the population.

The USSR failed on many levels. It never came anywhere near the promises that were made to the people. In fact, by June 1941, less than 25 years after the October Revolution, when Hitler invaded the USSR, the people of the conquered territories were largely glad to see the coming of the Germans. They were eager to be free of Marx, Lenin and Uncle Joe Stalin and saw the invading Germans as liberators.

But Hitler was such a megalomaniac, such an anti-Semite, such a eugenicist, such a madman that he turned from liberator to tyrant in one fell swoop with his ethic cleansing and Lebensraum (living space to the east of Germany to be used to settle Germanic peoples in the conquered territories).

My mention of Hitler was to demonstrate what an evil and ineffective system Communism was; so much so that ethnic Russians and citizens of the member states of the USSR were glad to see the foreign Germans. For a short time these peoples truly thought the Third Reich had come to save them from Stalin, and the most salient point is that these peoples really believed they needed saving. That point should never be overlooked.

And now we stand just past the beginning of the 21^st Century. Less than 100 years have passed since the October Revolution. In that time we witnessed the rise of the Soviet Union, WWII, the Cold War and the collapse of the grand Union. Seems it wasn't so damned grand after all.

Have any lessons been learned? If you ask me, not much has been changed since the heady days of 1917.

When I turn on a television or look at a newspaper I hear certain politicians and devotees of their cause espousing points sounding so familiar to The Revolutionary's Catechism.

We hear promises from the Left that they can and will fix America's problems, just like Lenin promised everything to all.

They advocate a form of "expropriations" in that they argue they must have more from the evil corporations, more from the "rich" as the Left coins them, to re-appropriate and re-allocate wealth in their vision.

They use the rhetoric of Marx in their advocacy of "Self-sacrifice in the service of the poor and the oppressed, the protest against an unjust society . . . ,"

So, can "Revolution . . . be successfully carried out by a narrow conspiratorial group of revolutionary leaders?" Can they lull us into passive acceptance so that "They [can] seize power first then transform a country accustom to slavish submission."

And to me, the most important question I have is, are Leftists willing to accept Nechaev's advice and acknowledgment that "Our task is terrible; universal destruction. To carry out the work of destroying the system . . . He must aggravate the miseries of the common people, so as to exhaust their patience and incite them to rebel."

Remember, I've warned before about the Left's Wear 'Em Down strategy, whereby the opposition keeps up all manner of complaint and disagreement, until, they hope, we vote them into office just to make it all go away. I believe the Left is truly aggravating "the miseries of the common people, so as to exhaust their patience and incite them to rebel."

And while the revolutionaries are busy stirring the pot, in order to get the backing of the public, "Lenin meanwhile promised it all: land for the peasants and peace for Russia."

This is crucial, in that the revolutionaries sow confusion among the populace, thus further confounding and hiding truth, all the while their leaders promise to fix the problem, which in reality are trumped up problems created to further their ends. When they claim they can "fix" it what they really mean in fact is that they will order their minions to cease their behavior.

So, does anyone else see this, or is it just me?

The Messiah is coming for ya.  A seemingly normal, non-worthy of note individual.  That was until He spoke to the unwashed masses, and lo and behold, He is the Messiah!

His lofty rhetoric washes over the uncleansed; the blind can now see; the deaf can now hear! The Messiah is leading us to the promised land.  It is all milk and honey.  Everyone is the same height and weight; we all have the same IQ; "from each according to his ability; to each according to his need."

A glorious day is upon us and we must flock to the robes of the Great One.  Will we stand in mute awe of His words?  Will we be moved to tears as have so many?  Will we join His legions?  Will He prevail upon we novice followers, the sheep to His shepherd? 

"Yes oh yes" I scream!  My voice wavers as I behold His countenance.  I tremble as His words wash over me. 

So, from my description, can the idle reader grasp about whom I am waxing rhetorically? 

That's right!  Vladamir  Lenin  has emerged from the masses to lead  we sheep to the land of milk & honey! 

Wait . . . hold on a minute here . . . "What's that you say?  Lenin is dead?  This treatise is not about the great Lenin, the Marxist of all Marxists?" 

"Then who was this little ditty about, anyway?"

"Barack Obama?  What the Hell is a Barack Obama?"

Oh, now I get it!  Nothing more need be said.  I just figured when I heard all the fainting and starry eyed looks from his admirers I thought we was talking about Lenin or Hitler, and when I listened to the rhetoric I immediately excluded Hitler 'cause he was a fascist, not a Marxist, and all this talk sure sounded Marxist to me, so I lept to the conclusion we were talking about the Great One, Vladamir Lenin!

So we were talking about something called "Barack Obama?"  This again begs the question, "What the Hell is a Barack Obama?"

Ahh . . . Barack Obama is a Marxist?  And he has legions of sheep jumping to follow his populist rhetoric?  And like his idols, Marx & Lenin, he talks about the proletariat and all the injustice, blah, blah, blah . . .

Huh?  Who'd a thunk it?  That in the United States of America such a stupid and disproven ideology as this extreme populist/Marxist crap this "Barack Obama" spouts would actually gain a following?

Looks like PT Barnum was right.   Apparently there is a sucker born every minute.  Don't believe me?  Just look at the adoring crowds as they blindly follow their Prophet.  A damned Marxist running for President!  What the Hell has happened in America?  Did I miss something?

Once again, which should really surprise no one, liberalism is wrong. I will present 3 distinct situations where the facts bely the liberal talking points of late.

As we have recently heard in media, the Earth seems to be experiencing some sort of completely unexpected and unexplainable cooling. How can that be? All I have heard since Republicans have held the White House since 2001 is that the Earth has a fever, or so says brain trust Algore. But Algore is not alone in his dumbfoundedness - no, he has millions of Liberals on his bandwagon.

Here is the truth, despite what the brilliant ones maintain: The warmest year on record for our planet was 1998. The previous hottest year of the Twentieth Century was 1934. Seems since '98 the Earth has been cooling. And now we hear the Earth is in for a 10 or 15 year cooling; of course the global warming will begin again at the end of that time, so they claim. Say what, you ask? Yep friends, they were either wrong or untruthful - you pick whichever one suits ya.

The second glaring recent example of Liberal "mouth in gear while brain is in park" is the quandary of the National Intelligence Estimate (NIE), the Iranian nuclear intentions and the recent UN nuclear watchdog team, the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA).

Remember this one? Last year the US NIE said Iran had stopped atomic enrichment. The Libs went apoplectic claiming Bush was tweaking the intel to fear monger and gin up support for him to bomb Iran. Then last month or so the IAEA, the UN agency, the darling of the Left and every petty dictator and despot on this rock said, "Yo, yo, Iran is lying - they ARE enriching atomic fuels for bombs!" So, after the leftmost ran Bush into the ground out comes the UN to say Iran is doing exactly what Bush claimed. Are we hearing any apologies from the wrong yet? Fat chance that!

And then there is my all time favorite - the Evil Oil Companies (EOC). You know the talking points: big oil is making record profits; big oil is price fixing; big oil is ripping off the little guy, blah, blah, blah.

Here are the realities: In this months Limbaugh Letter, according to University of Michigan economics professor Dr. Mark J. Perry we discover the following: For every $1 dollar of profit, the oil companies paid $3 dollars in taxes; the total tax rate on oil is about 40% while the average income tax on other corporations is 35%; 15% of the cost of gas at the pump goes to taxes while 4% is oil company profit; and saving the best for last, "According to Ernst & Young, from 1992 to 2006 the US oil industry earned profits of $900 billion - but spent $1.25 trillion on long-term investment (exploration, development, etc)." For the mathematically challenged, or Liberals, that means US oil companies invested about 1/3 more in research & development than they made in profits.

So, if we can't trust these brilliant ones to get it right about these 3 issues about which the Left has made so much noise and hot air, how can we trust them with the fate of our nation? If they can't get it right about these 3 issues how can we accept their assurance that Liberal ideas are the answer for our nation? All one must do to determine who is right, me or the brilliant ones, just cast an eastward glance at Europe. They have been Socialist for decades and guess what? They pale in comparison to US economic growth, stability, income and productivity. And if one has paid any attention at all guess what else Europe is doing?

They are going Conservative! Yep! Seems those who actually live Socialism and Liberalism have begun to see the err of their ways and are running back to the Right! And in so doing they are building power plants (shame, shame) and doing all manner of evil things that their populations are in desperate need of. Apparently Europe has begun to come to their senses. Apparently they have realized that wishing, or in our case Hope & Change, ain't gonna cut it. They have realized that Liberalism speaks to a lofty goal that is largely unattainable, and that Conservatism at least deals with what is and what is possible, as opposed to the wishing and hoping crowd (that's the Hope & Change crowd for you Leftys).

I could go on for days, but what would be the point? If you don't get it yet, you are likely never to get it.

So, there you have it. And these are just the three easiest and most glaring examples of Liberalism: Wrong! Again!

One of the first things I learned in life was that everything has a price. Any endeavor has its inherent risks and inaction can be fraught with peril as well, as sometimes doing nothing is worse than doing something.

We all know war has its price, and a terrible one it is. It is a shame one cannot demonstrate in any real quantifiable manner the price of inaction until well after the inaction becomes perilous on its own.  Europe and the world had to wait for Hitler to actually go one step too far before it was obvious that the small problem of a fascist dictator in Germany in the early 1930's had grown to a worldwide conflagration by the late 1930's.

The middle years of 1930's when something could have been done had come and gone. Before the world could correct their inaction's ramifications, 60,000,000 people would die. I think we can all agree that was one very expensive peace from 1933 to September, 1939.

And now we stand at a very similar crossroads. The difference this time is that instead of inaction, it's our actions for which many are expressing their anger and disagreement. This is truly one of those damned if you do, damned if you don't enigmas, where the price of action is a heavy one, but is it cheaper than the price of peace?

The two camps break down along political and ideological boundaries and we cannot seem to find consensus on what price we are willing to pay for our security, if we are paying it in the right and proper place and most especially, if now is the time we should be paying it.

Obviously, I fall in on the "Kill 'em all, let God sort 'em out," side of the fence, and the sooner the better, whereas the other camp argues for world consensus' and every machination imaginable of multi-lateral goings on, negotiation, possible sanctions, UN mandates, hollow threats and vagaries, hand wringing and all the rest.

I will not dismiss out of hand the other sides' position, but the fact remains, with regard to Iraq, I believe we spent 12 full years implementing my political opposition's points of view and doing little except threaten, cajole and hope. That tactic failed miserably, yet we seem so averse to utilizing the ultimate persuasion, as war is no more than taking diplomacy to its ultimate end. I fail to see how any other option is even remotely considerable in this case.

This is a real war, despite what you have been led to believe. Regardless of the talking points from media, this is as dirty, filthy and horrendous as any armed conflict, it's just being undertaken in a manner of attempting to leave as small a footprint as possible, and I personally believe this to be the wrong approach.

The public needs to wrap their minds around the concept that fighting war in the WWII manner of seizing and holding territory is out the window. When we add in the fact that our nation is implementing President Bush's admonition to go along with "business as usual, go shopping . . ." we find a nation seemingly not even aware we are at war. Now is not the time for us to be so lackadaisical in our mind's set.

All my sensory receptors are keenly aware our enemy is all too real. To ignore or marginalize their dedication and capabilities will be fatal, and in the long term will cost us far more money than were we to go find him, and destroy him and his ability to make war, in his safe havens.

The September 11, 2001 attacks cost this nation trillions; over 1.2 trillion dollars alone in the fall of the Dow in the week after trading resumed, plus hundreds of billions in physical damages, insurance payouts, lost earnings, layoffs, a deepening recession, and lost GDP in terms of all the associated costs to the economy. And the effect lasted for about 2 years before we could really climb back out.

Peace has many prices for which we must someday pay. If one could actually purchase lasting peace there would be no war. But you cannot buy peace; you can only buy time.  Has there ever been a price paid that permanently staved off conflict? I can think of none, although the paying of tribute is an ancient practice, so perhaps some tribe somewhere was actually bought off, but that would be the exception, not the rule.

The historical record is replete with accounts of various Barbarian tribes attacking Rome and other tribes in order to gain a cease fire and tribute for promised future good behavior, but almost without fail the tribute was nothing more than the buying of time and at most, temporary peace.  If you trade money for time you'd better be using that found time to prepare for what's coming next, because it is indeed coming. Putting your head in the sand and resting in the comfort of your purchased reprieve leads to a complete false sense of security.

Dreadfully we will continue in this manner until we again suffer the unthinkable. I can actually understand what is meant when a politician remarks we need another 9/11 to wake us up, or some such similar sentiment. Without the feeling that someone is holding a knife to our collective throats we will continue to dawdle in the doldrums of a cheaply purchased and pretended bliss.

We will continue act as if nothing out of the ordinary is going on and we will pay a severe price for our lack of resolve. All the while the vilest of all threats ever faced by Man lurks just outside our awareness. We've seen this before. How did it turn out the last time this approach was undertaken?  For the price of less than 6 years of peace, 60 million people died, trillions of dollars were spent and a whole race of people were damn near eradicated.

And as I sit here composing this article there are tens of millions of radicals who would like to pick up where Hitler left off and finish the work he started. And while they're at it they want to eliminate us too, because we are the eventual end target. As long as the USA lives, the Jews live, therefore our fate and that of Israel are inexorably tied until we die, the Jews die, or the radicals give up, or die themselves.

Considering the sober depiction I have presented, can one see any other option? So, what do we do? Fight now? Bide our time and try to stave off the coming battle?

Whatever we do today matters only in terms of time, because these people aren't going to go away on their own. We will be fighting them somewhere, sometime. Any student of military history will tell you there is absolutely no strategic or tactical advantage to be gained by allowing our enemy to choose the time, place and manner of conflict. None.

I suggest we stand up, shut up and get to doing what the Hell is required of us. I can guarantee you history will indeed be less than kind to our generation if we shrink from this hatred and aggression, and our procrastination will buy little more than time, and damn little of that too! How would history have viewed our parents and grandparents had they shirked their solemn duty?

So, any chance Mother Goose was a Fifth Columnist? To hear today's ardent American Leftist it would seem so. In this season of election hyperbole we hear all manner of fairytale, cleverly masked as some universal truth. Let's examine a couple of examples.

The most recent Liberal talking point in the midst of all this electioneering is the infamous "We can't drill our way out of this." Here is the truth. When the US proven reserves of off shore, ANWR and shale oil are compiled we discover the US has 3 to 4 times the proven oil reserves of the Saudis; to acquire oil one must drill. So, even though we have 3 or 4 times the oil of the Saudi's, and drilling is the only way to get the oil, now we hear from the erudite ones that "we can't drill our way out of this?"

Is it just me, or does this talking point seem counter intuitive? And then when we examine the Leftist solution besides drilling, the "Let's try and tax our way out of this," we find, once again, the Left is completely 180 degrees on the wrong side of common sense and plain old American get it done mentality. No news there though.

Should I bother to point out that in late week and weekend polling around 70% of Americans polled say "Drill the freakin' oil already?" So any proof needed to support my previous assessment of leftist backasswardness is as plain as the nose on your face. What more is needed to demonstrate that once again the Left is on the opposite side of most issues with mainstream Americans?

Issue number 2 in the countdown is Gay Marriage. California has used the usual Leftist tactic of "legislating from the bench." You know the one - the one where since you can't get what you want through the usual legislative practices, in this case California voters rejected gay marriage, you use Liberal judges to "rule" on the constitutionality of an issue in order to get what you want, and since the voters refuse, you use legislation from the bench to realize your desires. Again, California voters clearly rejected gay marriage, but as usual, the Left will get what they want by hook or crook and care not for the fairness or legality of their actions.

Remember Liberals believe themselves to be so much smarter than fly over Americans. So to circumvent the proper legal process of legislative action the Lefties use the courts to impose their vision of social mores upon us Red State idiots. Any wonder why it is always so important to the Lefties to get control of the nominating and confirmation processes of judges to the appellate and Federal benches?

The extreme and ardent Left, the "pushers" of all this radical crap, know full well that their vision of society, economy and governance are not those of run of the mill Americans. They have tried a million times to get their warped visions passed in the legislative process, and they usually fail, so they have taken a page from FDR's book and are trying to pack the bench with like-minded souls. They know only through this legislating from the bench do they have any possibility at all of getting what they want to come to fruition.

The third issue that runs counter intuitive to mainstream American common sense and love of tradition is the Messiah's pronouncement that he will bomb our allies (Pakistan) and hold a nice chit chat, with no preconditions (Obama's own words before he flip flopped and decided there would be some preconditions) with our enemies, Kim Jong-Il, Chavez, Castro, Assad of Syria and of course, everyone's favorite despot, the beady-eyed Ratboy of Iran.

At this point I am tempted to inquire, rhetorically of course, has anyone ever heard of "Unconditional Surrender?" It has in the past been a clever acronym for Gen. Grant's first two initials, US, as in Ulysses Simpson Grant, and it was also the policy of the Untied States toward our enemies in World War Two. So how did "Unconditional Surrender" work out for the North in that "late unpleasantness?" Pretty good, huh? And in World War Two the Nazis and Imperial Japan were destroyed by unconditional surrender, right? And that too worked out well for the world, right?

And now we come half-way around, 180 degrees opposite of American common sense and wisdom. We have the Democrat presidential nominee, The Messiah Himself employing the "Unconditional Surrender" mentality to our dealing with terrorists, third world despots and petty dictators, the hegemonic desires of Ratboy and Chavez, and the oil crisis.

But the Messiah's employment of Unconditional Surrender IS NOT used as the US has traditionally used it - as OUR attitude toward our enemies, but instead the Messiah's version of Unconditional Surrender is one where WE, the United States, unconditionally surrenders to the will of OPEC and Ratboy!

The Messiah has told us he will talk to our enemies, bomb our allies and surrender to the will of those with the oil. Are these things not 180 degrees opposite of how more traditional and mainstream Americans actually feel about these issues? Excepting for the ardent Leftist I occasionally encounter (yuk! wretch! gag!), I cannot for the life of me find a single mainstream American who thinks we should bomb our allies, chat with Ratboy, et al, and not a single person I engage, again excepting for the occasional anarchist/radical Leftist (it's all the same), thinks we should NOT drill for our own oil.

So, in closing, let us review: The Messiah says he will NEVER drill, ever! The Messiah says let's have a nice chat with our enemies and bomb our allies, and lastly let's make sure we completely circumvent the stated will of the American electorate and use judicial activism to impose our visions of morality upon our nation. The Messiah and his minions are advocating an absolute bastardization of all we know as traditional Americans.

Since when do Americans let others lead the way? Since when do we allow the despots of OPEC to dictate the prosperity of our nation? Since when do Americans give in without trying every available method of solution to a problem? Would Ronald Reagan have said "Yeah, OPEC has us by the short hairs. No use utilizing OUR OWN ENERGY RESERVES!" Would Reagan have suggested we try and tax our way out of an oil shortage when we have three times the oil reserves of the Saudis (and potential oil shale included in that number) yet , as the Messiah has stated "I will NEVER drill for oil!"

The Messiah and his minions are counter to all we traditional Americans favor and desire. I have one thing to address to the Messiah and his minions. Read carefully: I AM NOT A SURRENDER MONKEY! MY NATION IS NOT A SURRENDER MONKEY! WE WILL NOT UNCONDITIONALLY SURRENDER TO ANYONE OR ANYTHING! AND THAT INCLUDES YOUR BIZARRE AND WARPED VISION OF AMERICA!

We will drill our own oil! We will fight the terrorists wherever the Hell we find them! We will never cave to your Socialist principles and "Unconditional Surrender" mentality! Got it?

Okay friends; let's have a tad bit of fun here. If Conservatism is all I maintain, the epitome of individualism, then what is Liberalism, and does my bucking the Liberal mantra bring on the cautionary warning Resistance is Futile?

You know what analogy I would say is damn close to the Humanoid embodiment of Liberalism? Ever watch Star Trek: Next Generation? Ever see the recent Star Trek movies? Do you know who the Borg are? Remember them evil cats? Well, that's who the Liberals are!

In the Borg world (read Liberal), there is a central head and all power resides in that centralized location. Each soldier in the Borg army looks to the master for instruction, as well as for all their needs and requirements. The Borg army repays the master by way of two distinct but related efforts - to maintain the Borg world and to convert all to Borg. Remember - Resistance is Futile!

And each Borg soldier is a clone of the others. Oh, they may differ slightly in appearance, but not in personality. They are each a mirror image of the other. Two Borg or a million Borg - all the same. They march to an identical beat. They receive their instructions from a centralized source answerable only unto itself and with the one driving urge for their existence - to convert all to Borg! Resistance is Futile!

They justify all they do as acceptable as long as everyone is Borg. Resistance is Futile! They know no bounds of decency in their pursuit of oneness. Resistance is Futile! There are no acceptable alternatives. Resistance is Futile! The Borg exists only to create more Borg. Resistance is Futile! They perform no other duty. They have one purpose and one purpose only - to make new Borg, thus perpetuate the Borg. Resistance is Futile!

When the Borg are questioned as to why they exist, they answer according to the centralized power's desire - to make more Borg. They move tirelessly in that pursuit. If you can remove from them the Borg controller wedded to their brains they become nothing. But for the Borg and their leader's wishes they are lifeless and pointless.

Without the centralized brain telepathically instructing them the Borg are in suspended animation. As long as they do not see you as a threat, they ignore you. If they see you as useful to them, they convert you. If they see you as a threat, they convert or eliminate you. Resistance is Futile!

Ever wonder why Liberals join organizations, any organization, so often? Because without a centrally mandated purpose they are lifeless and pointless, just like the Borg. Resistance is Futile!

So the next time you watch Star Trek: Next Generation or see one of the later movies have a little fun. Replace the Borg soldiers with the faces and personalities of your favorite Libs. Imagine the Borg leader is Barack Obama. Hear the Borg soldiers repeat: (in the lifeless and emotionless voice of the automaton) He's different; He's new; He's for change; Resistance is Futile!

God I love Liberals! Their antics and their motivations leave me scratching my head and my rear end, but they never fail to leave me laughing! What passes their lips for wisdom provides me a never ending source of jocularity!

And oh yeah, RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!!!!!!!