To hear a Lefty tell it Archie Bunker is the arch-typical Conservative. If that's so, what would Archie think of this "Obama" thing?

Can you see in your mind's eye Archie and his son-in-law Michael "Meathead" Stivic arguing about this Messiah? What a great battle that would be. Meathead pushing his atheist agenda which just happens to nicely dovetail with the Messiah's; Archie screaming "Shut up, you!" at him, daughter Gloria screaming "Daddy!" and Edith running from the kitchen to the ratty old chair beside Archie's, all the while fretting "Ohhhh Archie!" Too funny.

Would the Messiah's message play well in 1971 Queens? Not likely.

Of all the things one could speculate as to what Archie would think of the Messiah, Pinko would clearly be the favorite. While the term was around long before Archie mainstreamed it, hardly a more accurate descriptor could exist, and if Archie called the Messiah a Pinko he'd be dead on the money.

Pinko was first coined "by Time magazine in 1926 as a variant on the noun and adjective pink, which had been used along with parlor pink since the beginning of the 20th century to refer to those of leftish sympathies, usually with an implication of "effeteness". In the 1920s, for example, a Wall Street Journal editorial described supporters of the progressive politician Robert La Follette as "visionaries, ne'er do wells, parlor pinks, reds, hyphenates men who have never seen a shovel."" (Wikipedia, Pinko) Pinko is also defined as a less red version; a sort of "Commie Lite."

I think Pinko is dead on the money. And I love the "effeteness" part of the definition. In examining the definition of "effete" we discover that to be effete is to be "lacking in wholesome vigor, degenerate; decadent; exhausted of vigor or energy; worn out, as in an 'effete political force.'

But is this a fair analogy? Is the Messiah any or all of these things?

Well, let's see here . . . . pinko's are effete, and effete is to be not wholesome and degenerate. They are decadent, so that's fair. Their political ideology is indeed "worn out" so they are an "effete political force," and I would argue the dictionary definition of the left is "unable to produce [therefore] sterile." Sounds dead on to me!

And how would I characterize the adherents to this ideology? If we remember the 1960's we see this political movement is indeed filled with "ne'er do wells," so I give it a "10" for accuracy and it's got a good beat so it's easy to dance to (that's an American Bandstand reference for you youngsters).

Are they "visionaries?" Insane visionaries, yes! They are so damned sure they are right. They believe only they have the vision, thus visionary wisdoms us regular Joes lack. They are convinced that it is us, we non-Pinko Americans, who stand in the way of this Marx-like vision that these brilliant thinkers advocate. As I have before heard offered, we must be dragged kicking and screaming into the future. How arrogant!

So if I grasp this brilliant ideology, these pinkos are going to right my nation and save us from the evils of our tired old conservative ways whereby we climb the ladder of success by sacrificing any and all in our way. Pollution? My fault! Disease? My fault! Poverty? My fault! Hunger? My fault! Unemployment, inflation, deficits, war, bin-Laden, blah, blah, blah? Yep, my fault!

Golly gee gosh, I wish I were as erudite and "visionary" as these pinkos! That's it for me friends! I have seen the light. I am abandoning Conservatism to join the effete who see what you troglodytes cannot.

I feel enlightened already! No longer need I consider facts & history. Context is just a word for "evil Conservative justification." Free speech is only to be forwarded if said speech agrees with them. Yeah, let's bring back the Fairness Doctrine - after all, we need to shut up these sister fornicating Conservatives somehow! And if turning our backs on the First Amendment is the tool to achieve our end, then so be it! After all, we are the smart ones; we are the visionaries. Like our Messiah, dare not question us about our methods. We are smarter and we know what's best for you idiots.

Man I do love this new position I have co-opted. As the "Brilliant Ones" have advised my former compatriots, those dumbassed Conservatives, they should quit kicking and screaming as we drag them into the future. You Conservative haters, you morons, you unfit to live in a egalitarian society need to heed the Pinko advice and just come along quietly.

Whew! I switched allegiances just in time, too. What luck! Now I can join the effete; the visionaries; the ne'er do wells; the parlor pinks. Now I am finally home. We, the erudite, will lead the way. Just shut up, quit kicking and screaming, and come along quietly. We know what's best for you. And pay absolutely no attention to the past failures of our effete desires, ways and ideology. Remember, we are smarter than you, and the only reason the other pinko ideologies of the world failed was because they didn't do it "smart enough; nuanced enough." Plus, we are well schooled in "staying on message," so we're gonna win this time around.

Wow! Who'd of ever thought that to be a pinko could be so liberating? Nice!